Part 3 by siff member : If your girlfriend/fiancé or her family is displaying a combination of these behaviors, thenyou might be dealing with a potential 498A abuser.
1.Her family: Is newly-rich, likes to show-off their house/cars/paintings/relatives/connections. They are related to politicians/bureaucrats/lawyers/judges/policeofficers. They may be living beyond their means. They may have a history offiling cases against anybody and everybody (search the website of the courts intheir state of residence). They may beat up their employees. Women in theirfamily may have been in more than one previous relationship.
2.Commitment Pusher: She comes on very strong, claiming, ” I’ve/we’ve never felt loved like this by anyone/or so close to anybody. ” An abusive girl/her family wil lput pressure on you/your family for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.
3.Jealous: Excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly; smellsyour jacket for perfume residue; checks your shirt collar for lipstick marks; andgoes through your pockets secretly.
4.Control freak: Interrogates you intensely (especially if you’re late) about whomyou talked to and where you were; wants her name on all your assets andcontrols all the money. Checks your laptop/mobile for possible clues all the time.
5.Unrealistic: Expects you to be the perfect man and meet her and her family’severy need, however unrealistic.
6.Divider & Ruler: Tries to cut you off from family and friends; accuses your well- wishers of ” causing trouble ”.
7.Attention seeker: These girls are always needy and seeking attention. They would never allow you to mix socially, especially with the opposite sex, even ifshe is your cousin.
8.Blame-gamer: Boss/employee/ex-boyfriend/ex-husband – it’s always someoneelse’s fault if anything goes wrong in her life.
9.Holds everyone else responsible for her own feelings: She will say ” Youmake me angry ” instead of ” I am angry ” or, ” You’re hurting me by not doing what I tell you. ” You would almost never hear her say ” You make me happy “.
10.Hypersensitive: Is easily insulted; claims that her feelings are hurt when she isreally mad. She’ll rant about how unjust people are to her even if they are quite fair.
11.Unbalanced rigid society roles: Expects you to serve and obey her/her familybut would never follow societal expectations of a woman.
12.Sudden mood swings: Switches from sweetly loving to explosively violent in amatter of minutes or, even worse, seconds. You’ll feel you are walking on”eggshells” all the time.
13.Threatening: Makes statements like, ” My parents will support me even if I murder someone, ” or ” A woman is always right/the system should always believe he woman, ” or ” I will cut you up the way a fisherman slices a fish, ” and then dismisses her own threats with, ” Oh, everybody talks that way, ” or ” I didn’t really mean it. ”
If things have come this far, it is high time you get help and get out before it is too late