By Mariela Govea* : Sexual addictions are on the rise. This type of sexual disorder is considered “fashion” because it occurs frequently in Hollywood celebrities. A bad model. Every day we sexologists see increasingly how people come to ask help for solving their sexual addiction problems. You mighy wonder what does it mean for someone to be a sex addict. Between sexual compulsion and promiscuity, basically sexual addiction is, first of all, a behavior disorder: There is an inner “emergency# that causes people to have sex indiscriminately with plenty of people, and I could turn easily into having a constelation of lovers. According to global studies, statistics indicate that sexual addictions affect men in 85% of the cases. But in every case, whether men or women are involved, the behavior is always the same and repeats he same pattern: no one chooses responsibly how and with whom they are having sex with-, that is why it can be described as a “compulsive” and “ promiscuous” sex. The social sanction on this behavour is usually very strong because it is a kind of sexuality that strongly impacts on people’s daily life: in many cases, families are absolutely devastated: the individual loses their partner, their children, their home and their work, because he or she devotes all his or her time only to having sex and to trying to get more, and more sex and dates by any means: more sexual encounters is all what counts to them.. Actually, a desperate search for intimacy and connection with someone is what is behind this behavior A sex addict is a person who can not handle situations and sexualizes all the situations every day. Clearly this person has great difficulties in building real relaionships and bonds, and this is reflected in their superficial relationships and in the way they relate to. As I have already remarked, most of these people usually have a lot of lovers, and at the same time they renew their circuit, at all times, looking casual dating, also in the web.. Another fact is that addicts and sex addicts are really porn movies consumers and also visit live chats, and browse porn sites many hours a day Given the urgency of their impulses, the sexual addict is quite similar to a compulsive gambler, an alcoholic unrecoverable, or a food addict. All of them have the same mental structure. And although it is a disorder that has no cure, and will always interfere daily life, sex addicts can “improve” – but not be cured-, as long as the person decides to take charge of their sexual choices and decide to have sex, with consciousness and responsibly and change their entire lifestyle.
.* Mariela Govea is Psichologist, Phsychoanalyst and Sexologist- She is President of Circulo Latinoamericano de Sexualidad Femenina. She is hinduist, buddhist and Tantra Master